it was all so strange and so surreal

[more_magic]

“I just want to know if Jodie Foster is here,” said Alex, and Darlington didn’t bother trying to suppress the flicker of irritation that bubbled up within him. They’d seen wonders tonight; the Arcadian peace of that vast forest, the glories of a Parrish painting come to life, reckless sacreligious hedonism in a flower-filled cathedral. And yet all she wanted was to celebrity-watch. Typical.

The fireflies lighting the room swarmed around them, the green-gold flash of their light almost pulsing with the beat of his heart. “For all you know,” he said, the words coming out thick and sluggish. His head reeled; he blinked hard, once, twice. “For all you know, that was Jodie Foster.” The room shimmered, the air suddenly heavy and cloying. They should keep going, finish their journey down; do the job they’d been set to at the start of the night. Before he could say anything, do anything, chivvy Alex along and out of the suffocation of the fifth level of Manuscript’s tomb, Lan Caihe turned back to face them, that enigmatic smile still on her face and the vast mirror of power churning behind her.

Descend.

He shouldn’t have heard her, not from this distance, but the word was as loud as if she’d been standing by his side.

Descend.

It passed through him like a shudder, and the world gave way along with it. He fell--he descended--landing on his feet in the middle of a cavern, the walls slick with moisture and the scent of tilled soil in the air. Someone was humming, something was humming, the sound reverberating straight to the center of him like it was the only thing that mattered. Darlington looked around for the source, his head taking an age to turn from one side to the other, until--

The mirror, that vault of power. It was here, bolted to the wall of the cave, the magic contained within swirling in eddies and whorls for a moment before slowly parting. Something was wrong here, gravely wrong, and he had to look away. But why would he? He’d wanted these glimpses of the uncanny, chased them and dreamed them and craved them, driven by his need to know everything he could about a world he’d only ever been given small tastes of. He could drink his fill now, granted this glorious opportunity by a goddess in celadon robes, and so he stared as the mist parted and the mirror cleared.

It was the room he’d just left, the banquet table still laden, the guests still crowded around the feast now rotted and spoiled, flies swarming around the goblets and maggots squirming in the cheese; everyone there aged and frail, using the last of their strength to lift a cup to their lips or bite into the desiccated husk of what might once have been a peach. Above them all stood Caihe, still youthful, lit by fire and glowing with power, her face changing with every breath: high priestess, hermit, hierophant, king and empress and fool. Darlington stared, shaking, at the face of his grandfather until the next exhalation whisked the sight away. His upper lip was wet; he lifted fingers to his face and saw them come away bloody.

“Darlington?” Someone was saying his name, a voice he knew, one he’d thought of as a broken woodwind when in fact it was the richest tone he’d ever heard, a symphony contained in the three syllables of his name. No, not his name. Not his name, any more than Alex was hers; they’d both christened themselves something new. He looked away from the crimson smear on his fingertips and back to the mirror. Like Caihe, she was unchanged, that Queen Mab crown still on her head and starlight still spangling her skin, her dress a dark flow of fabric along the lines of her body--but no, now she was Mab, a true Queen of the Night, beautiful and breathtaking, the points of a wheel or a crown seeming to turn behind her. Her mouth was lush and red, constellations he didn’t recognize reflected in the pooling blackness of her eyes, so much power coursing through her that it ought to be terrifying.

“What are you?” he heard himself ask, his voice soft with awe. No answer came, but that didn’t matter; he knelt anyway, putting himself at her feet and in her hands. He could see himself in the mirror, not as he was but as he wished to be: a knight with sword in hand, his fealty pledged to the creature before him if only she would choose to accept it. There was an ache in his chest from the wanting of it, another sword plunged into his back, piercing his heart; he felt the tears spill down his cheeks, mingling with the blood, the taste of copper and salt in his mouth.

“An acolyte at heart,” said Caihe, and Darlington knew she spoke truth. Choose me, he thought, he begged, staring up at Alex. She was not what she had seemed, nothing like what he’d assumed her to be, this girl who’d done nothing to earn the gift she’d been granted. She was his queen, and he would serve her until the end of his days, if only she would…

“Darlington,” she said again, one slim hand reaching for him, fingertips brushing the side of his face, cupping his chin. He closed his eyes, and dared to hope.

Comments

[more_magic]

Alex looks at him, something firm and challenging in her dark eyes that he's seen from her so many times before. That first day at Il Bastone, he'd thought of it as foolishness or recklessness, how willingly she'd put herself in his hands in a way he hadn't expected of her at all. Now, he wonders if he hadn't been mistaken in that, too; if what he'd seen then, sees now, is something more like trust.

Darlington still doesn't know if he's earned it, but he'll accept it anyway.

"It wasn't me." He ignores the small voice at the back of his mind that suggests that's not quite true, that he'd seen those flashes of reality--the couch, the room, Alex in her sweats--and had felt that deep desire for her even then. "Manuscript probably thought it was hilarious. Assholes."

He doesn't know what to say to the rest, how to answer the soft flush on Alex's cheeks, but maybe just for tonight he can let that part of it go. "Okay," he says, looking over at the bed and realizing just how exhausted he is. "No couch for either of us tonight, and if you have a t-shirt that'll fit, that should work well enough." There's still a slight warmth on his face, the knowledge that he's still blushing, but the smile he gives her is genuine.

"I'm glad I'm here too, Alex."

[takecourage]

"They really did," she says, forgetting that she hasn't explained the whole mess of timelines to him. Once she realises what she's said, she hopes it slides past him, for now, at least. Gives her long enough to figure out how to avoid telling him that he was already gone by the time she found herself here. She digs through the drawer where she's keeping her meagre collection of t-shirts and produces one that she'd found in a thrift store for some Darrow punk band, the logo worn and faded in a way that she really liked.

"Here. This one ought to fit..." She hands it over and then sits down on the bed, her knees drawn up.

Unbidden, she remembers that night with the moths at Il Bastogne, when she'd told him not to get Dawes and just stripped off her shirt.

"Or...I can go. If you want."

[more_magic]

The shirt she finds is soft and worn, the name of a band he doesn't recognize decorating the front, and Darlington takes it from her with another quiet smile. "Thanks." If he wonders a bit at her earlier response, the way she'd seemed so sure of what Mike and Kate and the rest of them thought of his disgrace, it's only at the back of his already-overwhelmed mind.

All he'd known was the vision. Anything could have occurred beyond that dulling, dizzying fog.

He takes his coat off, draping it over the back of Alex's desk chair, looking over at her again when she speaks in that halting and uncertain tone. "You don't need to go," he says, and knows he means it. "Not tonight."

[takecourage]

"Okay," she says, feeling suddenly young and vulnerable and weirdly close to tears just to have him in her space. She cradles her coffee cup and then takes a sip.

"Come on. Get comfortable."

[more_magic]

"Gladly, Alex," he says. Even so, he stays exactly as he is for a beat, something about the curled vulnerability he sees in her making his heart ache with an echo of that wanting from before. It's not the sword he'd envisioned while he was there on his knees, but something duller and sweeter.

He blinks, shaking his head faintly, then sits to pull off his boots and socks before standing again to undress the rest of the way, undoing his belt and unbuttoning his shirt, pushing his dark jeans down. He's aware of Alex, there on the bed--of course he is--but after everything her presence is more a comfort than an embarrassment. Down to his boxers, he pulls the t-shirt over his head and pads over to the vacant side of the bed.

"Think all this will make any more sense in the morning?"

[takecourage]

Alex might stare, fairly unashamedly, as Darlington undresses in front of her. Academically, she knows how much time he spends in the training room back in New Haven, but she's never seen him our of clothes before. His body is just as beautiful as his face, hard muscle and lean lines. Alex's eyes drop down to the right curve of his ass through the thin fabric of his boxers but she's looking at her coffee again by the time he turns around.

"I'll do my best," she says. "We can go and buy you some things, too."

[more_magic]

"We'll need to, won't we?" he says, his dark eyebrows ticking up as the fact of it dawns on him. Trapped here, far from home, all he has is what he arrived with. He nods, setting his coffee mug down on the nightstand before he climbs into bed, his long legs sliding beneath Alex's soft sheets.

"We'll go to that station you mentioned and get the packet, then go shopping. As good a plan as any." Another memory of those first sweltering days of their acquaintance occurs to him then, and he grins. "I imagine it's too much to hope Aunt Eileen is here to bankroll everything."

[takecourage]

Alex definitely does not look at Darlington's bare legs as they slide under the covers.

"'Fraid not," she says, setting down her coffee cup and lying down on her side facing him. "You do get an allowance from the city though. And if you've got plastic on you, it should still work."

[more_magic]

"Convenient," he says. "Thanks to the same people who put those packets together, I imagine."

The mention of an allowance makes him think about those lonely, lean years in the wake of his grandfather's death: the stack of bills filed away within the pages of 1776 growing thinner and thinner; coming home exhausted after a shift at the luncheonette or spreading manure at the park; afternoons at the library looking up auction catalogs and records in the hopes he wouldn't be cheated out of the value of whatever piece from the attic he planned to sell next.

He'd done it then. He could do it now, and this time, he wouldn't be alone.

Alex shifts, and Darlington's struck with the brief urge to brush her dark hair back behind her ear. Instead, he moves to lie back himself, pulling the covers so they settle easily around their shoulders. "Tomorrow's a new day. A new lot of things, come to think."

[takecourage]

"Mhmm" says Alex, fighting the urge to curl up into the warmth of him, just watching his face instead.

"There's a University. Lots of businesses and things. I need to go out and get a job. Don't know if I'm cut out for classes here."

[more_magic]

The corner of Darlington's mouth turns down just slightly when she says that, dismisses her own capabilities, because he doesn't think it's true--and because, at one time not long ago at all, he had.

"Of course you are," he says. "If you want to sign up, you should."

[takecourage]

Alex rolls one shoulder in a shrug. "I don't even know what I'd study. I don't know whether you'll be able transfer your credits or whatever." She stifles a yawn and rubs the tip of her nose against her pillow. "I'm just...really glad you're here."

[more_magic]

"I'll go by the campus and talk to someone," he says, an odd, warm ember sparking to life in his chest as he sees the way she nuzzles sleepily at the pillow. "If as many people as you say wind up here from elsewhere, they have to have a...protocol in place. Something."

He pushes up onto one elbow, looking down at her for a moment. "As am I," he says. "If we have to be trapped in a pocket universe, I'd rather it be together." He gives her a smile, then turns away to switch off the light on his side of the bed. "Sleep well, Stern."

[takecourage]

"You too, Darlington," she says, rolling onto her side and snapping off the light. Later, when his breathing has gone slow and shallow, she rolls over again, just watching his face while he sleeps, a few slow, silent tears slipping into the pillow.

It's a long time before she manages to fall asleep.

[more_magic]

His dreams are odd, fractured things all night long, fact and memory and fantasy blurring together until he's not sure where one stops and the next begins. Half-lucid, he tosses and turns, curling around Alex's slim, sleeping form. By the time morning comes, he's pressed snugly against her back, her backside nestled in the cradle of his hips, one of his hands resting along the curve of her tits, over her t-shirt.

He's aware of none of it as he sleeps on, least of all the hard ridge of his cock along the cleft of her ass.

[takecourage]

Alex wakes up slowly, lost in the familiarity of it. This was how she'd woken up the morning after the Manuscript party, and this was how she'd dreamed of waking up, that night that she'd slept in his bed without him. She doesn't move enough to make him stir, doesn't want to disturb him. She shifts back into the warmth of his body, the press of his cock against her ass, and closes her eyes, drifting in how good it feels to have him back again.

How safe.

[more_magic]

Darlington resurfaces slightly, coming out of the deeper waters of his dream; something hazy and golden, Alex beside him, her hand on his face, his arm around her waist. The details of it slip away as soon as he notices them, leaving behind only the feeing of contentment.

Feeling the gentle pressure of someone against him, he moves closer, his nose bumping against the nape of Alex's neck, breathing in the faint scent of her. His hand shifts, his thumb sketching a lazy circle against her nipple.

[takecourage]

She shouldn't let this go on too long, and she knows it. Instead of snapping at him about waking up and fucking her, like she did the first time, she just threads her fingers with his and gently disengages her hand, squeezing before she lets him go.

[more_magic]

The squeeze to his fingers gets him to wake further, letting out a soft sigh as he opens his eyes. In the morning light, he can see the tangle of her dark hair across the pillow, how the t-shirt she'd worn to bed had slipped a bit in the night, exposing the curve of her bare shoulder. It's only a moment after that that he realizes the state in which he'd awoken; he freezes, that shame from the night before washing briefly over him again.

"Sorry," he mumbles, shifting away from her. "I shouldn't have...I'm sorry."

[takecourage]

"If you don't stop apologising so much, you're going to sprain something," says Alex, stifling a yawn and rolling onto her back. "You're fine, Darlington. Stop worrying. That's like...not even on the top ten list of most unpleasant ways I've woken up in my life."

[more_magic]

"I was only..." he starts, lapsing into silence when he realizes he's not sure what he meant to say. Only trying to be respectful? Only caught up in a dream, the vestiges of that mist from last night? Only wanting to prove this doesn't mean anything? It's all of those, and none of them at all.

"Fine," he says at last. "I'll stop." Alex flops onto her back and Darlington moves again, shifting up slightly in a way that makes his head swim and pound with an unexpected headache. He groans, rubbing at the bridge of his nose. "Those assholes," he mutters, thoughts of writing furious emails--to the Lethe board, to Manuscript's trustees, to anyone who would listen--running through his head even as he knows they wouldn't be received. They wouldn't matter at all here.

[takecourage]

"Stay still until I've got some coffee and food in you," she says, sitting up and hauling herself out of bed. "Then we can make a plan of action. Shopping will fucking suck today."

[more_magic]

Darlington nods, realizing halfway through the motion that it was a terrible choice. His brain feels like it's been vigorously shaken--though knowing Manuscript, perhaps it had been. He sits up, reaching for his coffee mug and holding it out for Alex to take.

"A plan of action?" He looks at her, his eyebrows raised and a baffled half smile on his face. "We're going clothes shopping, not making a run on leftover bags of Snickers."

[takecourage]

Alex takes the coffee cup and pads into the kitchen, leaving the door open so that she can still talk to him.

"Time's weird here," she says, clicking the coffee on to brew and putting some bread in the toaster. "I know it's the day after halloween for you, but here? Christmas Eve. And we need to go clothes shopping."

[more_magic]

"How could we have lost nearly two months in the space of an evening, Alex?" he asks, his eyebrows ticking up. He's seen enough of the uncanny that he doesn't discount the idea completely, but it's still enough of a jolt to come as a surprise.

"That seems worthy of a stronger word than weird."